i am so over this
i cannot do hybrid classes, ever

i'll recap my birthday later on when i dont have other shit to do but anyway.
now i remember
vaugely remember last night
but i just know that i slipped back to my old habits.
which put my mind into a frenzy whilst i was at work today.

i shouldn't have expectations, should i?

no remorse

but what the fuck happened last night?

nineteen stars and i feel gr8

fuuck

why do i feel sad though HAHA. Why of all nights, am I having one on the night before my paper is due/same day/ my birthday.

however, for some odd reason, i feel like complete shit

18, you were good to me

i'm alive for now

stranded knights

the other pictures are somewhere but i really wants to seez them. anyway



Last night I drove up to Richmond with Isiah (pictured) and Vince. Upon our arrival to the city, we picked up Masco and went straight to the middle school where VCU was hosting the culture show. It was pretty good, for the most part. It was like FACS Folklore all over again, but less intimate, lots of technological mishaps, and not enough vocalization. Overall, I was pretty impressed with the people involved because I didn't know they were capable of coordination or acting skills haha. I sat alone the second half of the show because I lost all my friends to the front row. I didn't mind, though. Then after much confusing deliberation, awkward waiting and greetings, Isiah, Vince, and I followed Joy and them to Kim's house where I got ready with the girls. I rode with Joy, Allie, Nicole, and Wendy to Andrew's house where all the VCU kids threw down a party/ pregame to the culture show after party at Kobe's. It was the first pregame sesh I've ever been to but I got stoned with Tonetti, Dan, and Christian after getting tipsy or a little drunk or whatever. The girls were funny to say the least. I felt real goof at the party doe. Then we got stuffed into a car and went to Kobe's where I danced with the girls for the most part, then with Kevin and Marlon. LOOOOOOOL. Buuut it was fun though. THen I ran across the street with Audrey and Michael where in the middle of the street Christine parked and 8 people were stuffed into a sedan. ANd we were off to Kim's for an awkward wait. Isiah, Wendy, and I had no place so sleep so we stayed in my car till about 530 when Allen told me we could stay at General's. We got lost for an hour trying to find his apartment but we eventually got settled on his floor at 630am. Dropped off Wendy, got Vince from Nghias (where they had an after party afterparty but we chose not to go) and sped home in the rain. My ass hurts and so does my back. I only spent ten bucks in rva, and that was at the club hah. Oh whalez Heppi Birfdayz 2 me

This longing is killing me. It's like a double edged sword. It's stupid. Fuck you expectations.

UGH

is finding someone who wants to cuddle without making out too much to ask for?

grass and trees, but no highs

Note to self

Less attatchment
No expectations
=
Fewer dissapointments
Detatchment
Peace

project mvbasedgod

Party @ mvbasedgod, he knows how to throw a party. Even though I was drunk I took care of a few people. Most people I care about were actually there. Doing the bernie, dancing our asses off till most people fell, holding up stumbling folks, looking at the stars. It wuh gr8

Heppeh Easter!

i need to put this shit somewhere. all by mandy

I became reminiscent...about the times I had with pedro uncontrollable tears as all of the sorrows piled up one by one. She gives a big sigh. Stand up in fatigue and stares at the liquid feces container....she sighs once more and tears dripped down the toilet water. She flushes as she says her last words....goodbye pedro.

i think i'm going mad

I think I'm giving up on myself because I feel as though I'm thinning out.
Who knows what will be left of me in the future?
And all along, I thought I was building myself up.

second chances

i should have died
i should have been fired
i should have gotten hurt
but i didn't

woods

irritated

it doesn't even make sense